Chapter 11: Easy as Pi

Problem #1

Everything was ruined!

No, no. Sunflower just needed to calm down. There had to be a logical way to remedy the situation.

But all the food was gone!

No, there was an equation to fix this. There had to be. There had to be!

"Sunflower, what are you staring at?" Princess said as she entered the kitchen.

Sunflower pointed. "It's gone. It's all gone."

Princess walked over and stared into Fridgy. "Where's all the food?"

"I don't know."

"What about the food in the cabinets?"

"It's gone too."

"Who did this?"

"I don't know."

"Why--"

Sunflower grabbed Princess's shirt. "Princess, what are we going to do?!? I don't have a backup plan for this! I didn't think this could happen! It's all my fault!"

"Calm down. Maybe the food's still here. I don't think anybody took it. I fell asleep in the eating room last night and I would have woken up if somebody had come in the front door or broken a window."

"If that's true, then where's the food?"

At that moment, Ratty came trotting in with an apple in his mouth.

Sunflower narrowed her eyes and forced a, "You," through her teeth. "You ruined everything!" She charged at Ratty, but before she could reach him, Old Hobo Joe wrapped his arms around Sunflower.

"Let me go!" Sunflower said.

Vincent walked over beside Ratty and petted him. "He'll let you go, after you calm yourself."

Sunflower took a few deep breaths. "There, I'm calm now. So let me go!"

Vincent nodded at his friend. "Go ahead."

Old Hobo Joe released her.

Sunflower walked over to Ratty, as calmly as she could. "That…thing…ate all our food. There's no way we can keep him. We have to get rid of him. Now."

"No," Princess said. "This is his home, not ours."

"Either she leaves, or we can kiss our restaurant goodbye. It's our dreams or that rat's stomach."

Princess opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't say anything.

"If Ratty must go, he will go," Vincent said. He knelt down beside the rat. "Ratty, what say you come with me and Old Hobo Joe to our cardboard castle? There's all the food you can eat there. We'll have a jolly good time. How does that sound?"

Ratty stared at Vincent, then charged out the door at a speed seemingly impossible for a rat his size.

Sunflower ran into the eating area, but Ratty was nowhere to be seen. "Everybody, look around! We have to find her!"

They looked around.

A lot.

No one could find her.

Sunflower sat cross-legged on the kitchen floor, gazing at Fridgy.

Vincent sat beside her.

"I'm sorry, Vincent," she said. "I didn't want her to run away like that. I just…we've just worked so hard for this, you know? And I don't just mean the past few days. I mean, our whole lives. I feel like my whole life has been leading up to this moment."

"I understand." He looked down at the floor. "Do you think Ratty will ever come back?"

"I hope so."

Problem #2

Today, as a present, Vincent was going to give Ratty the stuffed cat that he got at the garage sale. He thought it would be nice if a rat loved a cat. But now he was gone, and there was nothing more he could do. Right now, his friends needed his help.

"The restaurant is opening at noon," Sunflower said. "So that means we have three hours to figure something out." Sunflower turned to Princess. "I'm out of ideas. Do you have any?"

Princess nodded. "There's only one person who can help us. I'll call him right now."

Problem #3

The phone rang.

Ein was about to pick it up, when Grandma pulled the phone line out of the wall.

"NO TALKIES ON THE PHONE TODAY, EINNY-POO! TODAY YOU GOT A DATE WITH DESTINY!"

Ein rubbed his eyes, just waking up. He looked over at his clock. "Ah!" he thought. "I gotta get to the restaurant! It's opening in three hours!"

"GET DRESSED! BE QUICK ABOUT IT! YOU DON'T WANT TO BE LATE FOR YOUR DATE!"

Grandma was right. He needed to--

Wait a second, how did she know about his date with Waitress Girl?!? No one knew about it. Not even Princess.

She bounced out of the room and closed the door, so Ein dressed himself, and went downstairs.

There, in his living room, stood a giant. About twice as tall as Ein, and just as thick. She had spiky red hair, like her head was on fire, and she was draped in camouflage. The most frightening part of her, her boots appeared to be made of some sort of metal.

"EINNY-POO, MEET DESTINY! DESTINY, MEET EINNY-POO!"

Ein looked up at the large woman and smiled. Destiny. More like Desbiggy. He laughed at his internal joke, then headed for the door.

"Where do you think you're going?" a powerful voice boomed from the woman's mouth, the air currents of which caused Ein's hair to dance on his head.

"My friends are expecting me. I really have to--"

"YOUR FRIENDS AREN'T MORE IMPORTANT THAN THIS!" Grandma said. "YOU'RE IN NEED OF DIRECTION, MY GRANDSON! STRUCTURE! AND THE BEST WAY FOR A BOY TO BECOME A MAN IS THROUGH THE GUIDANCE OF A STRONG WOMAN! AND FROM ALL MY YEARS OF TRAVELING THIS GREAT GLOBE, I'VE FOUND NO WOMAN STRONGER THAN DESTINY! LUCKY FOR YOU, SHE'S JUST YOUR AGE!"

Destiny wrapped her fingers around Ein's arm, and held on tight.

He knew right then. There was no escape.

Problem #4

They had enough money for bread, peanut butter, and jelly.

So, they had to change their menus, accordingly.

Princess patted Sunflower's arm. "Don't worry so much. As long as the Ninja and the Soap Stars show up, we'll do fine. The people won't care that we only have one thing on our menu."

Sunflower put her head down on the table again, and kept it there.

Princess went back into the kitchen. "How are the sandwiches coming?"

"Just fine." Vincent stood over the counter with an apron on. "Even I know how to make a peanut-butter-and-anchovy sandwich."

She was about to open her mouth when--

"Just kidding," Vincent added.

Old Hobo Joe sighed, putting away his tiny box of anchovies.

Princess smiled. They were actually doing good, considering all the problems so far. She wished Ein was here right now, but for some reason, his phone was busy. And they were doing alright without him. As long they didn't have any more problems, she felt pretty confident that they'd survive all this.

"Hello, pretty lady,"--a boy's voice said behind her.--"You must be the famous Princess I've heard so much about, you wouldn't believe all the things that Ein has told me about you, there was that time when you were at his house and…."

Princess turned around. The boy kept talking and talking and talking. But she couldn't hear him anymore. His outfit was a bit too loud, if it could be called an outfit. It was more like…equipment. Little rods and robotic eyeballs and things stuck out all over him. Lights flashed, all different colors.

"Excuse me, but…who are you?" Princess said.

"Oh, how rude of me, I'm Chucky Flabbing, Ein's friend from class, we--"

"Your parents are the soap stars, right?"

"Yes, they're here right now, but they're waiting in the dining area, but I thought I'd come here and say hi, but I expected Ein to be here too, and it seems kind of strange that he isn't here, because--"

"Yeah, it is strange. I don't know where he is. I'm sure he'll show up soon, though."

Chucky nodded, then walked around the kitchen, typing at some sort of miniature keyboard on his wrist.

"What are you doing?" Princess said.

"I'm looking for ghosts, I don't know if Ein told you, but this is a real haunted house, as least according to all of the information I found on the internet, and--"

"Are you going to be wearing that thing the whole time?"

Chucky smiled. "As long as you want my parents to stay here, I am, because this has been my lifelong dream to find a real ghost, and the thing I've discovered is that ghosts don't show themselves unless there are a lot of people around, and this grand opening is the perfect setting for a ghost to come out, and I'm almost positive that…"

He kept talking and talking, but all Princess could hear now was the little voice that said, "There's actually somebody nerdier than me and Ein put together."

Problem #5

"You're too skinny." Destiny shoved a steak into Ein's mouth. She placed her hands on the top and bottom of his head and forced him to chew it. "How can you expect to be a man if you don't put some muscles on those bones?"

Ein of course couldn't reply in any way, as he was being stuffed constantly with "manly food" as Destiny called it. Surprisingly (to himself especially), the worst part of this date wasn't Destiny, but the fact that the clock at the other end of the restaurant was at 11:50, and that meant the Haunted House Dressing was going to open soon, and he was going to miss the date with Waitress Girl.

"Stay right here," Destiny said. "I need to freshen up." She stood, turned away, then turned back. "Don't move!" She smiled and left.

Ein could have ran, but he doubted he could make it very far. If Destiny didn't catch him, his Grandma surely could. He saw her peeking in through the window every few minutes, checking up on him. Therefore, he concluded there was no escape.

But at least now he had a chance to run over and use the phone.

He called the number.

"Haunted House Dressing, can I help you?"

Ein cringed. It was Vincent. Why did it have to be Vincent? "Vincent, this is Ein."

"Hello, Ein."

"I need you to do something for me. Tell Princess that I'm held up and I can't make it to the grand opening. And tell Princess to tell Waitress Girl…Daisy that I'm sorry. Do you got that?"

"Yes, Ein."

Ein felt someone breathing on the top of his head. He turned around and Destiny towered over him. She throated, "Stop blabbing and get back to our date!"

"Just a second!" Ein cupped his hand over the phone. "You better do it, Vincent, or I'll show those pictures."

"Don't worry, Ein," Vincent said. "I will."

"Good."

"Goodbye, Ein."

"Bye." Ein hung up and ran back to his seat before Destiny could blow a fuse.

That was too easy.

Problem #6

Vincent hung up the phone, and smiled.

So Ein was on a date, was he? Perfect.

The best part was, Vincent knew exactly what restaurant Ein was at. He could tell by the music playing in the background. Vincent's father used to take him to that very same restaurant every weekend when he was a kid. It was the most expensive place in town, but that was the least of Ein's worries now.

Vincent walked into Sunflower's office, where she was scribbling wildly on all the papers lined up on her desk "I'm very sorry, Sunflower, but I just remembered I have to be somewhere. I made enough sandwiches to feed a hobo army, so that shouldn't be a problem. I'll be back as soon as I can."

She stopped writing and looked up. "Well, if you really have to."

"I really do."